I'd love to say a NO, but...
DON'T YOU tell yourself, `Wish I could do this at my workplace,' when a cheeky little kid stands tall and says a firm `no' to your order or request? Well, I do! Not many of us can be this saucy with our boss or colleagues, can we? Let's face it. How well do we know to say an effective `NO'? In fact, not too well! Right? Nodding our head for a `no' is something we think we can never do. Even when our mind warns us of the impending danger of work overload, those two letters - `no'- get struck in our throat and finally an `yes' ends up on the tip of the tongue. If you intend to say `yes', always know where to draw a line as to where and when to say an `yes'. Take only those works that you are willing and would be able to do.
No - it's too simple a word. But, why do we find it so hard to utter. The answer is right in us and it is left to us to dig further...
Reality bites
Boss's guy: We all love to volunteer to do the jobs that come from the boss. But, why do it when we don't like it? Impress him by doing your own job the right way. The cheerleader: Other's happiness gains importance than ours, right? It's the love for pleasing everyone we know that's keeping us say `yes' all the time. The team player: Team spirit is fine. But, is our own work not important? Remember, one is judged by one's own work. Don't slip and later regret. The scared: Don't worry; you won't be beheaded. You won't lose your job either! Finally, the job meant for you would go to somebody else, that's all. The saint: Professionalism will never leave way for disputes. So, don't fear that you'll end up having fights with your higher-ups or co-workers. Handle it with care and sing your way to live in harmony.
Handling the right word
It's always better to be honest and straightforward than to sit and weep all through. You'll only end up dampening your own spirit. Saying a simple `no' (take note, not an obstinate `no') with a lot of conviction would make things easy for you. This might sound simple, but it is not that easy. Remember, this is an art! Also, never discriminate between people who approach you for help. Being unbiased will earn you respect.
The direct hit: Don't beat around the bush to say a `no' when you don't want to do that job. A simple, polite and direct `no' is enough to convey your thoughts. Don't apologise for your refusal.
Soft refusal: This is, if you think a simple `no' is not enough and you want to handle it in a softer manner. First, acknowledge the person's request and then add an affirmative and a polite denial at the last. For example, "I know you prefer me to do this for you. But, I really can't help!"
Denial with a reason: If you think you need to provide a reason for your denial to the person who has approached, give a brief reason. Tell him why you will not be able to help him though you would love to help him out. Don't give any lame excuses. Provide him with a genuine one and assert that you mean it.
The rain check: You can use this style of saying a `no' when you think you can perhaps help this person out some other time. There is no place here for a definite `no'. You, in fact, give a hint that the person can approach you when you are free.
Now that you know how to handle the `no' business, create your own situation and try practicing. Last, but not the least, whenever you say a `no', make it a point to stick to it!
SRINARDHANI J
Srinardhani.hyd@cnkonline.com
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