When your boss wears a dress...

ARE you one of those who cannot show respect and admiration for that exacting higher-up in the pink collar who you think is heady and overbearing? Or is it one of those singular cases where a woman gets to be `the lady of the manor' and decides to put a man's nose to the grindstone? The situation tends to get heightened when one begins to attribute the oddities and failings of the ``fairer sex'' to the already exiting problem.

The final all-too-negative conclusion - ``women have no business being here, and it's time someone called it quits!''

Quitting is not always the answer when you can't take orders from a lady boss. When resentment sets in towards female counterparts, it is best to check the negative feelings before they get out of hand. For those who have realised that there is no escaping from a world where women are in top managerial positions, a change in the mindset is most essential before this attitude works against you and hampers career growth in the process.

Those willing to give it a try, consider this:

Gender benders

There's no denying it - gender bias does exist. It is normal for the Indian male to feel resentful towards a female boss. If you have been brought up feeling that women are meant to serve, and the male of the species as the `lord' and `master', it becomes difficult to work for a female boss. At such times it is best to think of your boss as an individual and who is not merely a `woman', but as a person vested with authority.

Speech breaches

Always be respectful. Hostility can get you nowhere, especially with female bosses. A defiant attitude gets noticed sooner or later and the detestable ``male chauvinist'' tag will be attributed to you.

If you are always trying to compete with your female counterparts and show them that you are the more developed of the species - that inherent desire betrays the fact that you are in a certain way giving in to your insecurities. Try not to be in competition with them, instead treat female bosses as your mentors, and your female co-workers as friends, companions and equals. When you and your superior are at loggerheads over an issue, suggest a way out subtly, without trying to impinge on her authority.

Fault finding

Agreed that women have their faults, but never forget that men have their share of shortcomings too. Every time you feel like being critical or judgemental, it is best to stop and consider rationally the value addition that your lady-boss brings to the table. Also remember that the learning experience counts - it is an advantage to know how to work best under a female boss.

Grinding halt

There's not much left to do except resign if you feel you cannot bear the brunt of a female boss, but the story isn't over once you've resigned. You may carry this attitude along to your next job. You've already jeopardised your chances of growth in the previous company, and chances are, you won't fare too well in your interpersonal relationships with your female counterparts and bosses in the next job as well.

However, if you are the only person who feels your boss is too domineering, you probably need to address your attitude.

Age no bar

People who get intimidated because they feel insecure or threatened by the presence of a female counterpart, may not actually feel that way if the person is much older or more experienced. Many people experience problems with women who are about their age or if a woman leader is chosen from among their ranks to lead them. If you feel intimidated because women your age or younger are much smarter than you are, just relax, and do your best, and members of the fairer sex seem to outshine you, acknowledge it, and gracefully move on.

Irksome indiscretion

It has taken a long time for women to make their presence felt and assert themselves in the corporate world. So they may be guarded and defensive about their freedom. Making things worse for them may be like stirring a hornet's nest! Picking on your boss just because she is a woman or passing sexist remarks in public are definitely not appreciated. Don't ever speak ill of your boss behind her back. It has a way of getting back to you. They may take offence to even the slightest of derogatory remarks.

Swear and tear!

Remember not to use foul language in the presence of female colleagues. Whether they say it or not, most women detest this.

Young executives are more prone to this kind of misdemeanour, so one must remember that what was permissible in college is a definite `no-no' in the corporate scenario, and words you may use as slang or swear words may just about find you getting into the bad books of your female boss and colleagues.

Make sure you treat them with due respect and dignity, to find yourself a place in a corporate world where gender apparently doesn't make a difference any longer!

ARCHANA JAYAKAR

archana.hyd@careercommunity.co.in